Crossword puzzle writers use the word “czar” a lot. Must be something about the odd proximity of the “c” and “z.”

Also “tsar,” the Russian variant, helpful with the clue “Nicholas II.” There are plenty of words starting with “st” but, aside from “tsunami” and “tsetse fly,” not so many “ts” words.

Know who else uses the word “czar” a lot?

Everyone else.

Czars seem to proliferate, at least in the language of people on public payrolls.

Members of Congress made it all the rage last week. On Monday, Sen. Lamar Alexander of Tennessee inaugurated a Car Czar Award. “It is a service to taxpayers from America’s newest automotive headquarters: Washington, D.C.,” he announced.

Congressman Cliff Stearns of Florida lamented on the House floor that President Obama “continues to appoint czar after czar to exercise government control over our free-market system.”

Congresswoman Michele Bachmann of Minnesota told her colleagues, “No business is safe when you see the administration appoint czars.”

And a voice from Texas, Congressman Ted Poe, spoke up: “There is no authority found anywhere in the Constitution to appoint these czars.”

Of course, this groundswell of czar talk came about not organically, an out-of-nowhere fashion trend like round sunglasses or Crocs, but at the direction of talking-point documents. All the lawmakers are Republican, and all got the same memo.

The czar tag means to disparage, an insinuation of monarchial governance. Despite the repeated implication, no Americans yet fear a return of the Romanovs.

True, members of Congress aren’t the only people throwing around the label. News accounts this year have included the titles border czar, health czar, technology czar, climate czar, regulatory czar and intelligence czar.

Even California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has a volunteerism czar.

That’s a lot of czars. At the White House Web site, a search turns up a dozen or so czar references, but almost all in media inquiries or answers to media inquiries.

In one briefing, press secretary Robert Gibbs said, “I’ve been asked in this room any number of times if the czars in our White House to deal with energy and health care had too much power.”

Excuse it as a media convenience. A fellow named Gil Kerlikowske carries the title “Director of the Office of National Drug Control Policy.” As shorthand, drug czar sounds reasonable.

An assortment of aristocratic and honorary titles exists: baron, earl, viscount, marquess. Would the federal government be worse for having a potentate of pay to handle distribution of bank bailout money?

In St. Joseph, problems exist with roads and restorations, with City Hall overhead and waste pipes underfoot. An authority figure dedicated to each might have a beneficial effect.

Maybe a Duke of Downtown. Maybe a Sultan of Sewers.

As homeowners work through foreclosure troubles, a Lord of Liens could be of civic use.

For City Council behavior, there could be a Sovereign of Swearing.

News came last week that the youngest son of North Korea’s tyrant Kim Jong Il got a new title, “Yongmyong-han Dongji.” Translated, it means “Brilliant Comrade.”

Forget about all the czars. Even despots love their kids.

Ken Newton’s column runs on Sunday and Tuesday.